glvalentine: (nerd alert)
Star Trek shirts at Hot Topic.

Oh, suddenly it's cool to like Star Trek?

You know what? You kids get off my lawn or I'll choke you with some two-year-old butterscotch candies, okay? I liked Star Trek before you were born, damn.*


* People who were born after I started watching Star Trek can now buy cigarettes. Fact.
glvalentine: (Default)
...how I missed you!

I was gone for the weekend at a family shindig. It involved two flights in which Northwest Airlines showed all the business finesse of a waffle, a refrigerator that sounded like fireworks, and the creepiest thing I have ever seen in my life (and no, it's not a family member). I am awaiting photo evidence of the last thing, because it is otherwise impossible to describe. More on that later.

Also, there was no TV and no internet at any point. I managed to eke out four thousand words in between 'vegetarian dinners' of canned peas and carrots and boiled green beans, but one more day and I would have slit throats for a wireless signal.

I'm in the process of answering email and trying to cram an entire weekend of bad movies into one evening. It's not easy, but I'm a pro.

Topshop

Apr. 12th, 2009 04:54 pm
glvalentine: (omg no)
I ended up in Topshop yesterday (long story). It was as awful as can be imagined, except that the Presets were on the store music, which would have been painful except that by then it was like the light at the end of the tunnel.

Also, amid the $50 cropped oversize sweatshirts (which I waved around squawking at the prices, just like a good grandmother should), they had one wall of stuff like this:



*swoons*

...for $250 a pop. *chokes*


(Seriously, I understand I do most of my shopping at Goodwill and therefore my idea of what things should cost vs. what they do cost is a little skewed, but seriously, $50 for a an oversize sweatshirt sliced off at the waist is just laughable.)
glvalentine: (Default)
I never watch the Golden Globes (all awards shows are dead to me after Gwyneth Paltrow beat out CATE BLANCHETT for an Oscar), but I was going to put up some real-time Golden Globe dresses, because there's nothing I love better than a pretty dress.

Then I caught this lovely sidebar link and got distracted.

Globe Actresses Gifted This $3,650 Compact



I guess I should be grateful they weren't handing out necklaces, but it seems embarrassing to pay so much for something that looks so ridiculous. Alexis Carrington would take one look at that and be like, "It's a bit...tacky, no?"
glvalentine: (nerd alert)
1. There are High School Musical dolls. They come in box sets. They are wildly popular, judging by the way two moms were fighting over them for their kids.

(God, I hope they were mothers.)

2. I have become one of those people that finds something she likes, buys four, and wears them one by one until they wear out.
glvalentine: (Default)



1. Directed by Karl Lagerfeld as a ten-minute advertisement for his clothes. He put it on the "interwebs" to catch the attention of young whippersnappers, apparently! AND IT WORKED.

2. "Who made that horror you're wearing?"
"Poiret."
"That doesn't surprise me."

Okay, this is a seriously catty and awesome fashion history in-joke. Chanel and Poiret were Not Fond of Each Other. (Stay coooooool boys!)

3. I am a sucker for silent films; all the Pre-Code nastiness and ridiculous visual metaphors and long, lingering close-ups of a woman talking for thirty seconds and then a single title card that says: "Until tonight, then." I love it all. Lagerfeld might as well have projected this movie directly into my heart.

4. All the title cards are in French, with a tiny English subtitle at the very bottom. If you don't speak conversational French, he doesn't even want you buying his clothes.

Six more reasons, and the movie! )
glvalentine: (Default)
So, bad news: Shoppers at a Wal-Mart trampled a worker to death during the early-morning rush.

Good news: No way to get trampled at Bluefly's Black Friday sale, where you can pick up an ugly coat for a mere $2,607.99, a 49% discount from the recommended retail price of $5,095.00.

...WHAT?
glvalentine: (Default)
'Tis the season for unsolicited mail, and my yearly Barney's catalog arrived today.

(If you have to ask if I actually buy things from Barney's, this must be your first time to the blog. I think Target is highway robbery.)

This year's theme is eco-friendly hippie (which is of course why they're sending out expensive paper catalogs to people who can't afford anything), but it means that I got to flip through it and laugh at all the over-size "organic' sweaters you can just pick up from Goodwill for ten bucks, or buy at Barney's for $1,695.

But there's a point where you stop laughing, and that point was page 13.



We're looking at the necklace on the left. Check out the copy:



That's $588,235.

And it's not on the site any more, as someone purchased it already. HAHAHAHAHA for fuck's sake.
glvalentine: (kitty the typewriter girl)
I have a new boyfriend!

I skulked around for a month looking at him, trying to cop a feel when I could, judging if I had room in my life. And I added up all the sad minutes I spent alone this week, just waiting, and knew I had to have him.



Technology continues to tromp ahead without me, by the way - this little guy has twice the hard drive space and memory of my main computer, which was so top of the line when I bought it that I had to uninstall all the NASA applications that came with it.

Now, this thing is lightweight (good to carry around all the time), has a surprisingly comfortable keyboard (which is nice, because I would never have the wherewithal to unfold a keyboard in public without knocking six things over), and has a bright, sharp screen. I know that last thing because I totally stalked some poor woman at the Whole Foods who was watching a movie on it. (Yuppiest sentence I've ever written, holy crap.)

ANYWAY, after ten minutes of staring at her down the counter like Mr. Goodbar, I went over and smoothly engaged her in conversation.

G: ...IS THAT A NICE COMPUTER?
Her: Please go away.
G: I LIKE YOUR COMPUTER.
Her: I have the cops on speed dial.

With that ringing endorsement, it was time to buy!

Once I bought him, I went home and had a nice bout of buyer's remorse. I spent the evening watching him charge up and trying to convince myself I hadn't just bankruped myself for all eternity. I exerted myself - "I LIKE MY COMPUTER" - until I believed it.

And I really do like it, bless its 2-pound heart. I don't usually name my computers (my other computer is "my computer", or occasionally "you bastard"), but I sort of had to after all this all-caps emoting.



His name is Fassbender Syndrome. (Jr.)
glvalentine: (Default)
Man, the last-minute gift catalogs keep pouring in to my house, despite my recent calls to every catalog I could think of, pleading with them not to cut down any more trees to send me hideous lists of items that I wouldn't buy even if I had the money.

There are some gems, though.

For the woman in your life who you're trying to drive out of it, I suggest this skirt:




It's a denim miniskirt with an attached leopard-print-and-roses floor-length skirt, and some lace to bridge the gap.

For those still undecided, it boasts five-pocket detailing!

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glvalentine: (Default)
Genevieve Valentine

September 2010

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